Date: January 28th, 2010

DONATELLA VERSACE GETS CRISPY ON THE BEACH

Donatella Versace Orange Suntan Wrinkles

At RumerMills we love nothing more than a nice olive suntan, but some celebs take it too far even for us – step forward serial offender Donatella Versace.

This picture is almost beyond words. We’re not quite sure what to say, other than GET IN THE SHADE WOMAN – NOW!

Nice to see the silicone boobs are holding up well – just a pity the shriveled skin around them is practically drooping to her knees.

Madonna at the Sticky and Sweet Tour

To think this dried up old piece of leather is only a couple of years older than Madonna. Suddenly M’s fear of tanning makes perfect sense to us!

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Date: January 28th, 2010

KATE MOSS GOES TOPLESS FOR BIZARRE PHOTOSHOOT

British Fashion Awards - Press Room

Heatworld has a video of a half-naked Kate Moss dancing around at a photo-shoot. It’s not funny, it’s not clever. It’s just… sad really.

Dear Kate - You’re somebody’s mother. Put your tits back in their padded bra and act your age!

Check it out here.

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Posted in Kate Moss | 1 Comment »

Date: January 25th, 2010

MADONNA’S TOYBOY GETS HIS KIT OFF

Madonna Jesus Luz Naked

OMG Blog has an outtake from Madonna and Jesus Luz’s raunchy photoshoot for W Magazine – showing Jesus completely naked!

Check out the NSFW pictures here.

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Date: January 21st, 2010

TORI SPELLING’S BATHROOM TREASURES

In an episode of reality show Tori & Dean screened this week it was confirmed that Tori Spelling’s indecency knows no bounds when nude photos of her were spotted hanging on her bathroom walls – that’s the same bathroom where her kids have to clean themselves and brush their teeth.

In the pictures we see a pregnant Tori being groped from behind by husband Dean, and separately grabbing her bare buttocks.

Those poor kids can scrub away ’til their little hearts are content but there’s no way they’ll ever feel clean with these vile pictures of their ho’ bag mother in full view! She should be ashamed of herself.

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Date: January 20th, 2010

IVANA TRUMP STRIPS TO HER UNDERWEAR ON BIG BROTHER UK

Question: When is it appropriate for a 60 year old woman to strip to her underwear on national TV?

Answer: NEVER!

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Date: January 16th, 2010

BBC WEATHERMAN IN SHOCK PHOTOSHOOT

UK weatherman Tomasz Schafernaker has shocked his largely conservative audience by stripping down to a pair of skimpy shorts for a photoshoot with British gay magazine Attitude Active. His bosses at the BBC are said to be somewhat upset over not being informed of the shoot in advance.

Until now his viewers had no idea that under his suit lay such an impressive physique. Now that the secret is out his bosses are said to be worried that many viewers will have trouble keeping their eyes focused on his weather maps and not him.

We say stuff the weather maps. The UK may be suffering some of its coldest temperatures in years, but knowing what lies beneath this guy’s suit will keep his viewers thoroughly warmed up.

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Date: January 14th, 2010

RONALDO CAN DO BETTER!

Cristiano Ronaldo was unveiled today as the new “face” of Armani underwear, though we doubt many people will be looking at his chiseled cheekbones. Certainly not when he’s poking so prominently out of his tighty-whities!

In another picture Ronaldo proudly flexes his stunning 6 pack, said to be the product of 3,000 sit ups per day.

At 24 years old he’s 10 years younger than the previous face of Armani, David Beckham. Although Becks’ campaign is one of the hottest things we’ve ever seen, the powers that be at Armani thought he was getting on a bit and decided to replace him with a younger model a bit like that time he cheated on Victoria with Rebecca Loos!

Ronaldo is developing a bit of a habit of mopping up David’s cast-offs. He played football at Manchester United after David had left for Real Madrid, then moved to Real Madrid after David had set sail for LA Galaxy. Lately he’s been seen spending much of his time-off in LA.

We couldn’t let the chance to publish the hottest ever picture of David Beckham pass, so in the interests of fair reporting we’ve decided to run a poll.

Who bulges better?

View Results

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Date: December 28th, 2009

LILY GETS TOPLESS FOR HARPER’S BAZAAR RUSSIA

Lily Allen Topless

Dear Lily,

Next time you’re asked to do a topless photo shoot, please pay some thought to having your AA breasts airbrushed into a respectable C cup.

Or, better still, ask Victoria Beckham for the number of her surgeon!

Yours,

RumerMills

Victoria-Beckham

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Date: December 7th, 2009

MORE FROM THE PLAYGIRL SHOOT

Levi NakedLevi Johnston continues to tease us with more almost-naked pictures from his Playgirl shoot. In the second batch of pics to hit the internet we see him covering his modesty with a large hockey glove.

From what we’ve heard about why Playgirl opted against taking fully nude shots, he needn’t have bothered with the glove – our sources say his little hands would have done the job just fine!

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Date: November 30th, 2009

NAUGHTY PICS END UP ON THE NET

grady-sizemore-picture

Cleveland Indians major league baseball star Grady Sizemore is the latest celeb to end up naked on the internet by foolishly sending intimate pictures of himself to his girlfriend’s e-mail account. Grady claims the pictures were stolen and posted without his knowledge, although in our experience it’s usually much closer to home than that (i.e. the celebs crave attention and post the pics themselves).

And if they were stolen, when will these idiots learn – fame and intimate snaps don’t mix! They always get out somehow…

Check out the NSFW pics here.

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Date: November 24th, 2009

LEVI JOHNSTON’S PLAYGIRL PICS HIT THE INTERNET

Levi Johnston

The Levi Johnston photos for Playgirl have finally hit the net and many of you will be disappointed to find that the shot above is about as revealing as it gets. Levi’s management promised that we’d be seeing his “hockey stick” in all it’s glory, but instead all we appear to get are a few PG-13 shots of him in the shower.

Check out the rest of the leaked photos here.

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Date: November 14th, 2009

PLAYGIRL SHOOT ‘WENT WELL’

s-JOHNSTON-large

Levi Johnston’s manager is reporting that his Playgirl photoshoot “went well” and that the magazine will be available to buy from next week. He also mentioned that the shoot rather bizarrely includes a ‘hockey stick’. Now is that a euphemism or a reference to one of the props? I guess we’ll need to wait until next week to find out!

Only in the US could the father of the almost Vice-President’s grandson be getting his kit off for the girls (and boys). We love it!

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Date: November 8th, 2009

NAKED ACTRESS LACKS CONFIDENCE

eva green

We smell an attention seeker!

Despite claiming that she ‘lacks confidence’ in her body, Bond girl Eva Green manages to find it in herself to strip off for this month’s Tatler magazine.

Who is she kidding!?

The star of Casino Royale surely realises that draping her naked body across a dining table for the world to see is NOT a requirement of being an actress, and if she really does lack confidence she has the option of saying NO to these jobs.

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Date: October 30th, 2009

X FACTOR JUDGE DANNII REVEALS ALL

Myer Spring/Summer 09/10 Collection Launch - Show

Dannii Minogue, the dance music diva, X Factor judge and, in many ways, more talented younger sister of Kylie, will be telling all to Piers Morgan in an in-depth interview on UK TV this Saturday night. We can’t wait, particularly as she’s going to dish the dirt on her 1994 marriage to Nip Tuck star Julian McMahon and reveal all about how she had to strip naked for Playboy in 1995 to pay off $200,000 worth of debts she’d run up. We have to comment on the fact that her not so supportive big sister Kylie had sold at least 20 million records by that point in time, surely she could have stepped in with a loan to prevent poor Dannii’s underwear having to come off!

We missed the Playboy pics first time round but are delighted to have uncovered them on the net. We’ve provided a taster below, for those of you who want to see the XXX versions click here (we must warn you that they’re NSFW).

Dannii Playboy

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Posted in Dannii Minogue | 2 Comments »